Home  |  Previous page  |  Search  |  Site map  |  About us  
  Forum  |  Health  |  Mobility  |  Services  |  Finance  |  Leisure  |  Nostalgia  |  Travel  |  Articles  |  Dating  |  Latest NewsLatest News  

nostalgic gifts

Subscribe to FREE Newsletter
Find out why?
 
KEEP SMILING !

Funny jokes
retirement jokes

Now scroll down to access some top humour & enjoy !

Funny general people jokes



 

Curtain rods

 

She spent the first day packing her belongings into boxes, crates and suitcases.

On the second day, the movers came and collect her things.

 

On the third day, she sat down at their beautiful dining room table in the house for the last time  and, by candle-light, put on some soft background music and feasted on a pound of shrimps, a jar of caviar, and a bottle of spring-water.

 

After she had finished, she went into each and every room in the house and deposited a few half-eaten shrimp shells dipped in caviar in side the hollow curtain rods.She then cleaned up the kitchen and left.

 

When the husband returned with  his new girlfriend, all was bliss for the first few days.

 

Then slowly, the house began to smell. They tried everything; cleaning, mopping and airing the place out. Vents were checked for dead rodents and carpets were steam cleaned. Air fresheners were hung everywhere.  Exterminators were brought in to set off gas canisters, during which they had to move out for a few days and in the end they even had the expensive wool carpeting replaced. Nothing worked.

 

People stopped coming over to visit.Repairmen refused to work in the

house. The maid quit.

 

Finally, they could not take the stench any longer and decided to move.

A month later, even though they had cut their price in half, they were unable to find a buyer for their stinky house.

 

Word got out and eventually even the local estate agents refused to return their calls.

 

Finally, they had to borrow a huge sum of money from the bank and purchase a new place.

 

The ex-wife called the man and asked how things were going.

 

He told her the saga of the rotting house. She listened politely and

said that she missed her old home terribly and would be willing to reduce her divorce settlement in exchange for getting the house back.

 

Knowing his ex-wife had no idea how bad the smell was, he agreed on a price that was about 1/10th of what the house had been worth, but only if she were to sign the papers that very day.

 

She agreed and within the hour his lawyers delivered the paperwork.

 

A week later the man and his girlfriend stood smiling as they watched the moving company pack everything to take to their new home.........      And to spite the ex-wife, they even took the curtain rods!!!!!!


 


 

Top of Page

 

Quick links...



Back to retirement Jokes main page

Sayings / Retirement quotes /

For all those born before 1945 / Golden Old Age poem

Senior citizen test / Age by chocolate / Job application / 39 Steps
View on Aging / How to stay young /
Something to think about

Click here for great retirement gift ideas /
Click here for great Nostalgic gift ideas



Agematch.com - the best and largest dating club for the young and old! Free to place a profile and read tens of thousands of active profiles. Experience the wonderful on-line dating now!

 

 

 

Retirement & old people jokes



 

Old people jokes

Joke Zone

Link to us | Other useful Links

 

 

Funny.co.uk - The UK's premier comedy site, with the latest news, articles and features, plus jokes, games and more.

Humor Planet

Jokers Masquerade - online retailer specialising in the supply of fancy dress costumes and accessories.

Humor in posters. - Bring joy to your home. Amazing Posters of Humor

GET YOUR JOKE RESOURCE LISTED ABOVE

If you would like to be added, just copy and paste the following HTML code into your desired webpage code. Then contact us to let us know. We will will then add your related link & description to our retirement jokes site and acknowledge with-out delay.

<p><a href="http://www.mabels.org.uk/retirement-jokes.htm">Funny old people jokes from Mabels . Here you will find a selection of the best old people jokes, quotes, poems,sayings & speeches as well as great retirement & nostalgic gift ideas.</a></p>

 

Other leisure pages : Gardening , Music/Videos , Reading , Pets , Hobbies , Travel , Sport , Competitions


Can't find what you're looking for here? Try a search:

Search Mabels
Enter Search Keywords:
Search the web

Click here to find out how thousands are improving their vision thanks to natural vision correction.

Recommendations:

eBay.co.uk
With millions of items listed & traded daily, it's easy to find what you're looking for and bag a bargain on the world's online marketplace. Click here to get bidding!

compare prices with Kelkoo


 

Top of Page / Home


Please visit us again..More funny general people jokes coming shortly.

Thank you

 
 

 

All content © 2007 Mabels.Funny general people jokes. All rights reserved.

Google Enter Search Keywords:
©2009/10 MAV-webdesign Ltd